Are You A People Pleaser?

By Christina Suter on Oct 14, 2017 at 05:55 AM in Business Issues
Are You A People Pleaser?

What does it cost you to be a people pleaser? Time? Money? Peace of Mind? Friendships? Are you scared it will cost you your friendships? What would your world look like if you stopped being a people pleaser and instead, answered from your greater self, knowing that giving too much can drain you. What if you found a way to talk to people in a way that was authentic and still accounted for all that you are.

Have you ever agreed to do something you know wasn't right for you? That's being a people pleaser. Usually, pleasing others creates a time problem where you overcommit your time, you let others lead in your life and make decisions for you. Maybe you don't like saying 'no' to people, maybe it makes you panic to tell someone no so you don't do it. When a phone call comes in and it's an upset client who's going to require 30 minutes of your time for the 5th time, do you take the call? Do you find in your business, though maybe not in your personal life, people pleasing equates to customer service? 

What do you get when you're an overwhelmed people pleaser? You don't get the unbothered work at time you need, projects are turned in late, you leave work late and pick up your kid late, you become desperate for time to yourself. When you allow people to steal your time you become overrun by your business. I am guilty of letting things slip and I am often asked by my assistant whether old things we've spoken about are still important because I sometimes take on too much. A few years ago my CPA had an employee who was trying to tell her how to run her business because she wasn't holding her employee accountable for deadlines and because she was sharing with her employee more than she should. I have to keep my accountability appointments with my employees so they understand I'm in charge.

The indirect effect of being overwhelmed is you don't keep the accountability with your employees. The direct effect of overwhelm is you rely on those employees to support you emotionally and they wonder who the leader is.


People pleasing in business can also mean listening to and taking the suggestion of a client about what your business should do or offer. I had a client who ran an adventure fitness business and they had a suggestion to offer memberships at $45 per month. Their business offered a premium product and that doesn't fit with the membership model but after thinking it about it they decided it wasn't going to work for them. Though they didn't adopt a membership model it distracted them for a while and the next time it was suggested they were able to say no right away. Years ago I ran a space and had a suggestion given by a smart businessman in the world of metaphysics and it made me question whether I was running my business wrong. I compared what he said to what the vision for my business and though it may have worked for someone else's business, it wasn't going to work for my business. 

Clients will offer things that work for them but you have to make sure changes don't cause your business to suffer. If multiple clients say it, consider, it, but if not, stay focused. What you consistently commit to is what will grow. What you think about, expands and what you dwell upon determines your destination. Stay consistent so you can build a structure where you and your business move forward with peace of mind. Being more accountable for your actions, distractions, and growing your business. 

You are the single element that determines how your life goes. I have a hard time focusing, people close to me know this, but my clients think I'm consistent and I want them to think that of me. But, I'm constantly people pleasing and ready to start something new all the time, so I know first-hand the true cost of not having my business and brand grow because of saying yes and being distracted. Fulfill your purpose and know that you're contributing to the planet.